I smelled
your towels.
We need to talk.
Forty years of telling people their laundry could do better. Now it is on a carton. One capful and your clothes will want to go out without you.
Four scents.
Three sizes.
No excuses.
Everything Nonna makes fits in a carton. Pick your colour world — or take all four, which is what everybody ends up doing anyway.
This one is
Blu Notte
One capful. That is all she needs.
25 ml into the fabric softener compartment. Not with the detergent — Nonna wants her own drawer.
Any programme, any temperature. Including your good jumper. Especially your good jumper.
Three to five per jumper on average. Nonna is not counting. She already knows.
Nutrition facts,
but for your laundry.
No bullet list of empty promises. Just the label, the way it is on every carton of milk — only more honest.
Something just landed on you?
Calm down. Nonna knows.
Tap your disaster and you get the protocol that actually works. Based on the type of stain, not on guesswork.
These five get misread more than any others, and each one is the reason somebody somewhere owns a jumper that no longer fits. Tap one.
Read the full label decoder →Cannot smell it?
Then you get your money back.
Full stop.
Nonna does not promise much. But she promises this: wash with it, smell it, and if you are not sold we pay you back. No form, no "do you still have the receipt". And you keep the carton.
Why it is not the one from the supermarket.
Laundry perfume is an unregulated shelf. Anyone can put scent in a bottle and call it a booster. Here is what is actually in ours, next to what the category normally does.
Category figures are typical ranges for mainstream scent boosters, not a claim about any one brand. Ours are on the back of the carton, where you can check them.
Nonna makes four batches a year.
Members get first refusal.
Small runs are not a marketing decision, they are a consequence of making it properly. Which means every batch runs out, and somebody has to be told first. The Society is the list of people who are.
Recently sighted
Nonna does not run a customer service department. She runs a network. These were reported to her and she has chosen to print them.
Peg up what you have to say.
Reviews, but on the line. Write your note and watch it start swinging with the rest.
Never run out again.
The milkman used to come round. He still does — only this time you smell good afterwards. Pick your rhythm, pay 15% less, cancel whenever. Nonna does not hold on to people. Only grandchildren.
Everything Nonna makes
Four scents, three sizes, a few bundles and one sweater that gets you far too many questions.
He leaves it on the step
before you run out.
15% off every carton, shipping always free, and you never have to think about laundry perfume again. Skip a delivery whenever. Cancel whenever. Nonna will not make it awkward.
On every carton, every size, every delivery. Limited drops included.
Still got half a carton? One tap and the milkman sits this round out.
No phone call, no "may I ask why". Nonna is offended but she understands.
She is not sweet.
She is right.
There is a generation of women who know exactly how to get a stain out of a blouse, how much fabric softener you actually need (less than you think), and why that jumper should never go near a tumble dryer. Nobody ever gave those women a brand.
Nonna's Laundry is that brand. No soft pastels and no "a hint of lavender". Four colours you recognise from ten metres away, in a carton that wants to live on your counter instead of under your sink.
Why a milk carton? Because laundry perfume has sat in the same boring plastic bottle for forty years and nobody ever dared change it. A gable-top carton pours better, looks better and recycles better. And because it is funny. That is allowed to be a reason.
"I spent thirty years saying it could be better. Now I say it on a carton."
The stain hotline
Tap whatever is on you. Nonna gives you the protocol — and the things you should absolutely not do, because that is usually where it goes wrong.
Laundry symbols,
explained properly.
There are twenty-nine care symbols in common use and almost nobody has been taught what they mean. The whole system runs on five shapes: a tub for washing, a triangle for bleaching, a square for drying, an iron for ironing, and a circle for professional cleaning. Once you know that, the rest is just modifiers.
Numbers only ever appear inside the tub and are degrees Celsius. Dots always mean heat, and more dots mean more of it. Bars underneath a symbol are about how roughly the machine may treat the fabric, not how hot it may get — which is the single most useful thing on this page, because that is where most garments are actually lost.
Below is every symbol, what it means, and what happens if you ignore it. Nonna has added her own note to each one. She was not asked to.
The five that get misread most
If you only remember five symbols on this page, remember these. Between them they account for most of the garments that come out of a machine a different size, a different colour or a different shape from the one they went in.
Frequently asked
And once you can read the label
Everything on this page tells you how to protect a garment. None of it tells you how to make it smell like anything. That part goes in the fabric softener compartment, follows the tub symbol and nothing else, and is safe on anything that can be machine washed at all.
See the shelf →Peg up what you have to say.
4.9 average across 2,847 notes. Nonna reads every one of them, whether she wants to or not.
What does your laundry basket say about you?
Nonna does not read your future in the stars. She reads it in the drum. Five questions and she knows which scent is yours.
A list of people
who get told first.
There is no membership fee and no card. There is a list, Nonna keeps it, and when a batch is ready the list hears about it before the website does.
The batch opens for members first. By the time it goes public, the members have already decided.
A fifth of every run is reserved for the list and does not go on general sale, however quickly the rest moves.
The code arrives the moment you join. It does not expire, because Nonna finds countdown timers undignified.
Sometimes fewer. She is not going to write to you about nothing, and she would like the same courtesy.
What Nonna writes down,
and what she does not.
No twelve pages of legal text. Here is the whole thing, in plain language.
What we keep
If you join The Society, use the footer form or start filling in the checkout, we store:
- Your email address. This is the only thing we actually need.
- Your name and town, if you typed them in. Not your street or postcode — those never leave your browser.
- What was in your basket and what it was worth, so we know which scent to tell you about first.
- Where you were on the site when you gave it, and which browser you used.
One thing we want to be straight about
In the checkout, your email address is saved the moment you have finished typing it — not when you click a button. That is deliberate: the shop is not open yet, and we would rather know who wanted to order than lose you at the last step. You will see a line under the field telling you so, as it happens. If you would rather we forget it, the button at the bottom of this page removes it immediately.
Why
One reason: to tell you when the first batch is ready, and to send the discount code we promised. That is it. We do not profile you, we do not sell anything to anyone, and there is no advertising pixel following you around.
Where it lives
In a single Google spreadsheet that only Nonna's Laundry can open. Google processes it on our behalf as a data processor. Nothing goes to a third party, and there is no mailing platform hooked up.
How long
Until the first batch launches, plus twelve months. If you have not opened a single email in that time, we assume you have changed your mind and delete you. Or delete yourself below, whenever you like — no reason needed.
The washing line
Notes you peg up are published on the site with the name you type. Use a first name or a nickname; Nonna does not need your surname. Want yours taken down? Mail us and it is gone the same day.
Your rights
You can ask what we have on you, have it corrected, or have it deleted — the last one you can do yourself, right here. You can also complain to the Dutch Data Protection Authority (Autoriteit Persoonsgegevens) if you think we are handling this badly. We would rather you told us first: ciao@nonnaslaundry.com
Take me off the list
Type the address you signed up with. It is removed from our records straight away — not marked inactive, actually deleted.
No hard feelings. Nonna will pretend otherwise.
Express checkout
Or fill in your details below.
Contact
This is where Nonna sends your confirmation.
Delivery address
Shipping method
Payment
All transactions are encrypted and secure.
What people ask
How the carton gets to you
Free shipping over €35. Below that it is €4.95. Belgium and Germany €6.95, free over €50.
Order before 11pm, on your doormat tomorrow. Working days. At the weekend Nonna does nothing, which she has earned.
30 days to change your mind. Even if the carton is open. Even if it is half empty. Send an email and the money is back within 3 working days. Keep the carton — Nonna does not want half-used laundry perfume back in her warehouse.
Track & trace arrives by email the moment the carton leaves.
Say it
Nonna reads everything herself. Reply within one working day, unless she is cooking.
Or just: ciao@nonnaslaundry.com